


The Selfishness

by 2BlueEyez



Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Arguing, Cole just wanted to help, Dragon Age: Inquisition - Freeform, Fluff, I Don't Even Know, I'm walking away now...you're on your own, Resolved Argument Prompt Exchange, What Have I Done, What Was I Thinking?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-18
Updated: 2016-05-18
Packaged: 2018-06-09 07:09:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,529
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6894964
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/2BlueEyez/pseuds/2BlueEyez
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lavellan, the Herald, got back from the Storm Coast wanting only to see a certain Commander. Too bad he avoids her every chance he gets and puts her on the back burner for a month. With preparations being made for the peace talks at Halamshiral, Lavellan is on edge and Cullen finally wanting to talk with her is the last thing that she needs...or is it?</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Selfishness

**Author's Note:**

> I...really don't know what I've done...
> 
> I rated this Mature because of implications of sexual content and some vulgar language.  
> Also, Female Lavellan isn't the Inquisitor, just the Herald. Her brother is the Inquisitor.  
> I might do a full story with this version...still debating on that.  
> Here are the translations for the Elven: (and these are just rough translations)
> 
> Vhenan- My heart  
> Ane telithal telsila- Your worry blinds you (or "You are blind to worry")
> 
>  
> 
> Enjoy (Sorry for any grammer/spelling mistakes.)  
> \---------------------------------------------------

  This was getting her nowhere. For the past hour, Lavellan had all but paced a hole into the balcony. Vivienne simply stopped in to help the Herald pick out a suitable dress for the ball at the Winter Palace. But one comment on the dress’s plunging neckline leaving Cullen a drooling mess and she lost it. Her anger more evident each minute that past. Lavellan had finally calmed to a point that Vivienne was able to chime in.

    “Frowning like that will do nothing for you, my dear. In a year or so, you will regret being upset when you see the acquired wrinkles.” She moved from leaning against the door frame, to standing directly in front of Lavellan. She placed a hand in the air to stop the next monologue Vivienne knew would eventually spew from the Herald’s mouth. “Now, you need to repeat your rant, all I got out of it was that our commander is acting somewhat childish before I could no longer follow your oration. You slipped into Elven, a language I am not so familiar with, darling.”

  Lavellan ran a hand through her breeze-tousled ashen hair and took a deep breath. Before she began her speech, minus the Elven, Vivienne’s expression made her fall silent.

    “I am childish?” The strong drawled voice swept across the balcony. Lavellan turned to face the owner of it, bracing herself for the storm she felt brewing. “Me? You are the one who blew up at me and then ran away immediately to avoid me.”

  Vivienne took the opportunity to excuse herself, leaving the couple to their argument. She already was late for an appointment with Lavellan’s brother, the Inquisitor. She was helping him pick suitable outfits for the Ball. There would be plenty of bickering with him as well, not that she needed to listen to anymore. She heard enough from Dorian about The Iron Bull. Yet, even as she closed the door to the Herald’s bed chamber she could still make out their words.

    “Yes, you are childish. I would not have blown up at you if you did not have that tantrum when I suggested on going to the Storm Coast with Bull and his Chargers.” Lavellan wasn’t going to back down from this. He had no right to tell her she could and couldn’t do something. She put her hands on her hips and Cullen responded in kind, crossing his arms defensively.

    “Tantrum? What I did was express my view point. You were going on a three month trek with _only_ Bull and his charges. You did not even allow Galahald to accompany you!” Her lips thinned as was her patients for this man.

    “You _did_ have a tantrum! And what of it?! First off, my brother knows I can handle myself. Secondly, I have been on many travels with just him and his Chargers and not once did you have such a problem. Creators, Cullen! Iron Bull and Dorian are together, finally. You think he do anything to mess that up?” She threw her hands up in frustration. “Ane telithal tesila!”

  He knew this phrase too well. Countless times she had said it to her brother and Solas whenever they second guessed her.

    “But she is wrong this time. He thinks she is avoiding his meaning. How could she know what he means if he will not say it without all the words; wrapping, winding, weaving his hurt with hers.” Both too upset with each other to give Cole a second glance.

    “Stay out of this!” They echo each other, but never break eye contact.

    “But, your hurt is too loud. I can help.” All Lavellan did was simply point towards the door and Cole seemed to understand. He simply faded and they were alone once again. She took a deep breath, slightly thankful for the distraction. She walked over to the railing and slightly leaned on it, looking towards the breath-taking view of the mountains. She was reminded she was still in the gown Vivienne dubbed perfect for her by the gush of wind. The faint shiver didn’t go unnoticed by Cullen. He tugged off his cape and moved to gently put it on shoulders, where his hands lingered briefly, before he stepped beside her.

    “I fail to see what angered you.” Still not able to bring herself to look at Cullen, but Lavellan wasn’t one to sweep issues under the rug either. “I left abruptly so I could calm down. That fight- that…that was what I wished to avoid. Not you. Never you, Cullen.”

  His turn to confess.

    “I was jealous -and before you interrupt me- I know Dorian and Bull are together and I do trust you, but Maker, I… Regardless of it all, I was. When it comes to you, I am. And you were talking about leaving for three months after only a week of recovery from Adamant.” He watched the love of his life battle for her life and then fall into the Fade. He almost thought he lost her, until she walked out of the rift Erimond had opened and sealed it with one gesture. It hurt him to see the wounds acquired on her from that battle. And then only a week goes by and she wants to leave again and before her wounds have fully healed. Something in him broke at that point.

  Lavellan spun so her back, covered by Cullen’s cape, would receive the assault from the wind. She tilted her head to look right into his eyes. There she saw what he wasn’t saying.  

    “I’m not fragile Cullen. I’m not going to break because of a few wounds here and there. What hurt most was you avoiding me when I returned.” His hand caressed her cheek. She batted it aside and shook her head at him. “A month. I have been back for an entire month and the only times I have seen you were in the War Room during meetings. I tried to talk with you before and you are nowhere to be seen. Dammit, Cullen, I was gone for three months and all I wanted when I returned was to see you.”

  She gnawed on her bottom lip, searching for the right words to say. It seemed Cullen was one step ahead. _As always_. He stood in front of Lavellan, taking her hands in his. He noticed the blisters, undoubtedly cause by her bow, and the slight glowing scar from the anchor. He wished, more than anything, he could take that burden away for her.

    “I wanted that too, but I-When I saw you…Maker’s breath, I worry about you. Yet, you run recklessly into danger. Radcliffe, Therinfal Redoubt, Haven-” Lavellan freed one hand and gently placed it over his mouth, her finger tips gently brushing his lips, to interrupt him. She knew why he was upset. It was the same reason she was whenever she left him. They were afraid to lose each other.

    “I’m not doing this unwarranted. When I was with my clan, all it seemed I did was made mistakes. But now, now I am I able to do something. And it is not just for me. The entire world of Thedas is-” Cullen couldn’t and wouldn’t hear anything else about the world being on her shoulders. Not while she was with him. He pulled her to him, his lips finding hers. As the passion built between each sigh and moan, tongues wrestling for control, Cullen spun them and walked her backwards until her back was firmly pressed against the stone wall. He broke the kiss but trapped her where she was, barely and inch between their lips.

    “I know, believe me. But is it wrong of me to want you safe, here, with me. I cannot help but be selfish when it comes to you.” Neither was sure who initiated the next kiss and little did they care. The next few hours passed in a haze of whispers and sighs building with each kiss, touch, and climax. Finally spent, Cullen cuddled Lavellan against his side, her head on his chest listening to his heartbeat.

    “Five hours, that has to be a new record?” Lavellan jested as she teased the Commander’s abdomen with deft fingers, tracing along the lines of each ab. He chuckled at her joke, but she knew her words had him slightly blushing. She brought her fingers to a halt and tilted her head back to look up at his ruggedly handsome face.

    “Vhenan, I never want to leave you when I have to, and your selfishness is an adorable trait, but you must understand that I can’t stop being who I am now.” He simply kissed her forehead and held her tighter in a silent agreement. A smug expression lit across her face “I hope you know, we have a month’s worth of making up to do.”

  He laughed shifting so he was hovering above her, one arm and his legs supporting his weight. The other hand capturing both her hands and holding them over her head rested on the pillows. “You are wrong about that, my lady. We have four months.”


End file.
